A long time alone, on my walk getting stoned
I arrived at a desire for shelter and began home
On my way back from the train tracks
I had aimed past emotions stained black
But they came back when I saw her letter
I didn’t think she could sink… I thought I knew her better
I didn’t bother trying to father, she’s a grown girl
Acting out the most childish shit in the whole world
So, I brushed it off. I threw it away
I had a couple thoughts, but I knew what she’d say
Didn’t go over or phone her. I told nobody
I didn’t even stay sober. Stayed happy go lucky
Didn’t think it worthwhile
To have to exert myself
Her cry for help, it was doomed from the start
I’m just too full of myself to make her room in my heart.
I hate to add, and this will probably just make her mad
But, I erased the mixtape, the one with songs from dates we had
Crimson and… oh sure, now I’ll want to take her back
Now that she wants to kill herself, over the way I acted
If it came to that, I’d act as though I gave a damn
But, I ain’t here to hold her hand, I ain’t her dad
She’ll get over this eventually, it’s basic math
Time’s a healer of hearts, though he’s a patient man
My heart’s a sacred land, she can’t build there
I treat her so poorly, I can’t believe she still cares
I confine myself to my self like it’s a wheelchair
So, when I think of others, I get real scared
About, let’s see, how will this affect me?
They shouldn’t expect me to care, I’ve been set free
I was pretty sure that she was just lying at first
But, wait it gets worse
Then I got a phone call and the whole shit snow balled
Out of control, weighing down on my soul
My ex met death, just like she wrote in her note
About… how I took her for a ride and she felt run over
I hope her suicide truly consoled her
Fuck it, why’s her mom calling me anyway?
But, wait a minute…
She doesn’t seem to know that we’ve been broken up
So I act tear-soaked, too choked to have spoken up
I didn’t exactly lie, when I realized,
That her mother never once mentioned suicide
Who am I to correct? This woman’s depressed
I acquiesced—just responded with a “yes”
Like “yes, it must have been a hit and run,
I completely agree that this tragedy’s a bitter one
But, how could we have known? It was warningless”
“Alright. Goodnight. I’ll come by tomorrow morning-ish”
When I hung up, I was back at the train tracks
Back with a backpack full of spray-paint cans
Back to the same crap, my thoughts stained black
Throwing up an end-to-end burner to explain that
A young girl just crucified herself, while the devil watched in horror
Sick Caroline…
She could have had the last word, if she hadn’t happened to hurt
That’s why you don’t quit the game right after your turn
Sick Caroline…
She could have had the last word if she didn’t have to be hurt
That’s why you don’t quit the game right after your turn
Because others will keep playing when you’ve left.
“And what’s that make you think?”
“It makes me want to help… but that’s not what I do.”
supported by 15 fans who also own “My Turn – 12:58am, June 13, 2001”
Factor never disappoints, always solid for me. Those features too! i think I've found a huge amount of new artists just through factors music over the years. Arsenal Malfunction
supported by 10 fans who also own “My Turn – 12:58am, June 13, 2001”
Unbelievable album. You sir definitely keep hiphop as real as it gets. Thanks for all your dope shit over the years and hope to keep hearing more for years to come. yukoncornelius69